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Friday, September 15, 2017 by Manyi
A committed relationship means two people in love, right? That’s what you’ve always assumed it’s meant. You’ve been really happy dating your boyfriend. Maybe things haven’t been completely perfect but no relationship is. You both have tried hard to make things work and you feel that you two have a bright future ahead of you together. It’s lovely when a woman feels that way but what if the man she’s committed to is traveling down a completely different emotional path? What if your boyfriend wants to date other people? If that’s the hurdle you now have to face, you need a plan to ensure you get what you want out of this.
If your boyfriend wants to date other people don’t overreact. That sounds ridiculous, doesn’t it? How could you possibly not fly off the handle upon hearing that the only man you want to be with is ready to play the field. You feel rejected and despondent. You feel like you’re just not enough for him. You have to try your best to not look at the situation from this vantage point. You can’t lose faith in yourself and the amazing woman you are just because he is having a temporary lapse of good judgement. You’re going to show your boyfriend that you’re the only woman for him and you’re going to do it in a way that will shock and surprise him.
Begin by listening to the rationale behind his desire to date outside of your relationship. Many men will say things like they feel things are moving too quickly and they want to make sure you’re the one. Or they’ll claim that they want you both to have other experiences so there aren’t any regrets later on. These may be the real reason behind your boyfriend wanting to date other women but it’s likely much more about him being interested in someone in particular. He may have met another woman that he’s attracted to so he feels he needs to let you go so he can have the experiences he wants to have with her.
It’s hard to face this if you truly love him but it’s important to see the bright side of the coin. He told you before venturing outside your relationship. He didn’t cheat on you and that’s a sign that he really does care for you and respect you. That’s why you must react to his desire to date other women in a very specific and controlled way.
Tell him you understand that he needs this and you want what’s best for you both. Don’t fly into an uncontrollable jealous rage and don’t fall apart into a puddle of tears. Keep your chin up and your self confidence intact. Wish him well on his new dating adventures and then get to work creating new experiences of your own. You shouldn’t “date” a new man if you still love your ex, but you should give the impression that you are. Go out and have fun in places that men frequent. Clubs are perfect for this. Your boyfriend will hear through the community grapevine what you’re doing and it will sting.
When you do talk to him, allude to the fact that you’re in a hurry because you have plans. If he asks with whom, don’t answer directly. These small mysterious gestures on your part will get to him. He’ll realize that since he’s dating other people, you have the freedom to do that now too and that won’t sit well with him if he does still care for you. You need that to happen so he’ll change his tune and come running back with the desire to be committed to you and you alone.
Saying or doing the wrong thing can impact your future with the man you love.
If you still need and want him don’t leave your future with him to chance, there are ways to win him back.
He wants to date other people. The moment your boyfriend said that you felt the future you imagined being torn away from you. You couldn’t believe your ears. The last thing you want is to see anyone else. How can you even consider it given how much you love him, right? He obviously sees things very differently than you do. You have to do whatever you can to try and salvage the relationship. The problem is that unless you do the right things at the right time you may cause even more emotional distance between the two of you and the relationship will be over for good.
The normal reaction you’re likely to have when he says he wants to see other people is to fight him about it. You’re going to feel envious, rejected and angry. Essentially what your boyfriend is telling you is that he’s not happy with you so he needs to see what else is out there. There’s absolutely no way that won’t hurt. You have to process that pain though and then pick your heart up off the ground and get to work changing his mind in a very subtle and specific way.
As hard as it is going to be when he tells you that you two need a break so you can date others, agree with him. Naturally, you’re not going to feel this is a positive step, but it’s actually the best reaction you can have. First and foremost, by not falling apart emotionally and begging him to reconsider, you’re showing him how strong and resilient you are. He’ll be blown away by this and actually very confused.
By agreeing with him about seeing other people you’re also sending him a subtle message that you’re going to do the same thing. What you may not realize right at this moment is that your boyfriend hasn’t given any thought at all to the idea of you dating other men. He’s selfishly been considering what it will be like for him to see other women. The moment he realizes that you may just start getting to know another guy he’ll rethink his decision.
Once you’ve told him that you’re okay with the idea of seeing others, give him some space. Don’t call him up every day asking if he’s dating. Don’t go to the same night spots as he does hoping to catch him with another woman. If you do anything like that you’ll be undermining your plan to get him back. You must appear to not really care what’s going on with him. Your ignoring him is ultimately what will draw him back because he’ll see that you’re perfectly fine without him.
You can change things if he wants to date other people.
Learn the guaranteed way to get him devoted to you again by clicking here.